A baby's smile makes parents' hearts beat faster. Time and again, mums and dads tell me how thrilled they are when their child smiles at them. What a wonderful moment when that happens for the first time! Even after so many years in the profession, my heart still lights up when I see a baby smile.
A baby's smile has even been proven to make parents happy. Research has known for some time that mothers release happiness hormones in response to their child's smile and that their reward system is more strongly activated in the brain than when other children smile. The exhausting, because far too short, last night is then often quickly forgotten. In this way, nature has given the little ones something in the cradle that ultimately ensures their survival because it strengthens the bond with their carers. After all, an infant is completely helpless on its own and therefore dependent on the care of other people.
Involuntary angelic smile
The child is already practising various facial expressions in its mother's womb. And this includes smiling, as impressive ultrasound images show. British researchers from Durham University have used this method to document the facial expressions of unborn babies and discovered that this is the case: When unborn babies perceive the flavour of carrots in the amniotic fluid, they often smile. If, on the other hand, they discover the flavour of cabbage in the amniotic fluid, many unborn babies grimace tearfully. This targeted reaction to flavour perceptions is really interesting. Incidentally, we can also deduce from this that cabbage is unlikely to be one of the favourite foods of young children later on...
Because children can smile in the womb, they can of course also smile as soon as they are born. Such a tender, soundless smiling face looks really adorable and really gets the parental love and care flowing. That's good!
Nevertheless, in the first days and weeks of your baby's life, it is not yet the conscious smile with which it will react to contact with you a little later. Rather, this very first smile as part of his facial expressions is a pure reflex that you can best observe when your child is asleep. A reflexive muscle tension causes the baby's lips to curl into a smile. These muscle movements are therefore known as "reflex smiles" or "pre-smiles". But precisely because it looks so enchanting, it is also affectionately referred to as an "angel's smile" in the first few weeks of life. And I'm sure that you will automatically respond with a smile - and that your child will unconsciously feel it, even when they are asleep. You see: Parents and newborns alike are equipped with reflexive smiles, which are incredibly valuable for both sides!
But as I said, science has not yet conclusively established what triggers this very first smile in a child. Are there any triggers at all - or are they actually involuntary muscle movements? Or is the baby showing its well-being in this way? Is it perhaps dreaming something "nice"? Researching these questions is of course not easy, which is why there are only assumptions so far. One theory, for example, assumes that the "angel's smile" is innate in the child because it is supposed to awaken the protective instincts "in the baby's clan" (i.e. the good care of the child and the parental Binding.
So far, these are all just assumptions. But there is also empirical knowledge. And in my experience as a midwife, a newborn really only shows this very first smile when it is comfortable. In any case, I have never seen it when the baby is squirming unhappily on the changing table, when it is hungry, when it is cold during sleep or even in pain, for example when blood is being taken.
Whatever the underlying reason for baby's innate smile, it is yet to develop into a so-called Social smile develop further. Whether and how this happens depends very much on how often and how much the baby is smiled at by its carers.
Interesting in this context: Initially, all babies smile the "angel smile", even those who were born blind. However, as soon as they are able to smile consciously, their smile diminishes over time. Why? Because they cannot look into a face that smiles at them. Children with a severe visual impairment therefore lack the external stimulus to smile or the smile of their carer(s) that tells them: I'm here, I love you, everything is OK. Studies have also shown that even sighted babies stop smiling over time if they regularly do not see a smile from their closest carers. For some children and their development, therefore, a Postpartum depression become problematic for the mother. Mothers who are ill in this way are often unable to muster the strength or emotion to smile at their child. This is not their fault, but rather due to the illness, which in many cases requires treatment. Other carers, such as the father or grandparents, who can give the baby a warm smile, are then particularly important for the child.
Conscious social smile
At around four to six weeks, babies recognise "their people" and are happy to see them. Then they gradually begin to smile consciously. The smile now also reaches the baby's eyes when it sees mum or dad. The whole face then lights up. At this stage of development, we speak of the so-called Social smile. This is how babies express their joy at seeing other people - but also their interest in making contact with others themselves. Babies will soon be smiling at anyone who appears to be likeable. They also smile at strangers or even a tempting toy.
Regularly, healthy adults can't help it: we simply have to beam back with delight. Once again, that's a good thing! Because that's exactly what the baby needs at such times. It is particularly important for the child that mum and dad smile back. This makes them feel reassured and safe. Ultimately, your answering smile strengthens the Basic trust and self-confidence of your child.
It works the same way the other way round: your active smile encourages your child to smile back happily. And you have probably already experienced the happy feeling that floods through you when your baby reacts to this. It's no different for your child. Incidentally, even babies can sense very precisely whether a caregiver's smile is "genuine", i.e. whether the emotions match what they see. If this is not the case, it unsettles and confuses the child.
Over time, baby's initially soundless smile is then increasingly accompanied by sounds. The child begins to gurgle and coo, squeak and babble. It now practises these wonderful sounds more and more in different pitches - and tells you many stories. At the same time, these are important building blocks in the Language developmentof the child. The smile becomes a laugh, the facial expression becomes a verbal expression of joy and well-being. When practising speech sounds for laughter, it is also absolutely right and important for parents to "answer" their child, i.e. to pick up baby's sound melodies, mirror them back and have a wonderful dialogue with the child. Most parents often do this quite intuitively - and in doing so, they also intensify the Parent-child bonding .
At around six months, children are already able to distinguish between people they know well and less familiar or complete strangers. Now the baby no longer smiles indiscriminately at everything and everyone. No, it now differentiates exactly who it is smiling at. Of course, these are usually the people he knows and trusts, who regularly spend time with him and look after him.
Shortly before the first birthday, anticipation will put a smile on your child's face. They have learnt to associate certain actions and their consequences with each other. For example, your little dwarf will laugh happily when daddy's wiggling fingers come close to their little feet without even touching them. Because the child knows: I'm about to have my feet tickled! You can now also experience a trustingly crowing and gurgling child when it hides behind a curtain or under a table in front of you. If you find it there (after a long search, of course!) and it lands safely in your arms again, it will laugh and be happy. In this adventurous moment, the feeling of "I'm safe with mummy/daddy" is simply unbeatable!
Tip: It is said that (small) children laugh around 400 times a day. Adults, on the other hand, only manage this about 15 times a day. Perhaps we should simply let ourselves be infected by the little ones more often and smile and laugh more - because that's not only good for the little ones, but also for us!
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